Today I posted this photo to Instagram and Facebook with a caption (that you can see below) that enraptured all that I am feeling and going through. It is the first time that I have posted something like this and made myself vulnerable to numerous opinions from various people, but this is the start to helping myself, and making myself better. Lay all of my cards on the table and start from new.
Caption: “It’s time for change. I have spent most of my life wishing that I was someone else; someone more popular, someone prettier, someone thinner, funnier, smarter, more talented. Wishing that my forehead was smaller, stomach flatter, arms thinner, legs smaller and less muscly. Wishing I had more friends, less friends, people more loyal and supportive, people who just liked me for me. I look at people and envy them. I want to be them. I want to be anyone other than myself, and this needs to stop. I need to start liking myself; my large forehead, big arms and muscly legs, my non flat stomach and my crazy style. I need to start being chunky but funky; not caring what people think or what people say about me. I need to start being me for me, not for anyone else. And anyone who doesn’t like that, or the real me for that fact, is out. No more trying to please everyone, no more trying to be who everyone wants me to be. I am me and I will start to like it. It’ll take time but I’ll get there. Many people will be shocked to read these opinions, thoughts, and emotions, but this is just an insight to my mind, to my life, and what I’m dealing and struggling with. I am getting help and I will get back to being my old, normal self soon enough. But it’ll take some time and strength to get there. Anyone who is suffering from mental illness should know that they are not alone, there are others out there who are suffering as you are and it is ok to ask for help. Be strong and be you. 💕💞💓💗💖💘💝”